November 17, 2024 – Healing with the Land
I am so grateful that a former student, now colleague asked me to go out for a walk. What a good reminder about being out on the land and going outside. I’ve been so spooked to go outside from last year when there were so many bears out and about the neighbourhood. It’s more about not trusting me rather than the bears. I am definitely not “bear-aware” but I love going outside and walking. I have not been doing either as much as I would like to and it’s having an impact.
I mentioned in my last blog post about health and not being ashamed of it if it’s not going well. The goal is to do something about it. I have been struggling for the last couple of weeks and trying my best to get better while being productive. Seems like an unrealistic ask, but I am ok that I am not as productive as I could be. Slowly but surely, I’ve been trying to get back to “regular speed.” I’m not quite there yet, but I am feeling a bit better. That’s what matters. PROGRESS.
We went to the trails near the Forests of the World. We walked by the pit house and I was so enamoured by the environment. I took a lot of photos and none of them are as good as the real thing. The air was crisp and the sun was shining. Walking through the snow was like walking on the sand on the beach. It was pristine. I enjoyed our conversation and it was good to catch up. I was grateful. It was also great to see other people on the trail, walking or mountain biking.
I never thought I would be a “snow-person” but I really enjoyed going out today. Being on the land, being in good company, and appreciating this place so close ot my home was a wonderful and healing experience. Although I was not 100%, I tried my best to be in the moment and to be present. After, we went for coffee, then I went home to rest and take care of myself. Listening to my body takes intentionality, slowness, and patience. I needed to rest… and I was ok with that.
The “old Christine”…. Maybe “Christine 4″… would have just ignored myself physical symptoms and just plowed forward driven by guilt and fear. This behaviour is sadly common for teachers. It’s not a good one and I’ve done this self-neglect for a long time. Nothing is more important than your health. Without it, you have nothing, so take care of it. Being out on the land today was a wonderful reminder that I’m not alone on this journey. Going outside helps.